Office Space

Today is the fall equinox. 

It's time to align.
To coordinate.

I haven't published anything since the 4th of July.
I went all summer swinging from my hands beneath the tight rope, confusing it for a trapeze.
It's time to climb on top, position my feet, and walk to the other side.
Balance, balance, balance.

The tail end of my last writing cycle was explosive and motivating and since then everything in my brain has turned into murky waters. 
It's sort of the way I would see an old New Orleanian swamp: still mystic, still ready to cause some Creole voodoo, still dusted with very slow banjo music, still creeping with gators, but very hushed and on pause. Just cruising along in my little boat I suppose, checking out the water logged tombs, keeping quiet, sipping on my moonshine. 

We are currently in the dark of the moon which feels unsettlingly pacific considering this is the summer of the "Super Moon" and the last 3 months have been nothing but hype and over exposure. 

I'll tell ya, that last full moon was a doozy. It was the best I could do to try and get out of its way.

Lately, I've been finally piecing together the last of my home office. I knew I wanted it to be a place where I would feel comfortable and productive and above all else, inspired. What I ultimately envisioned was the Denver Planetarium but obviously, my one smallish room wasn't enough to hold the cosmic crown, so I had to make some alterations.

Originally, this area was the same crematorium grey as the rest of the house. I wanted an infinite blue color for the walls and in the end went with Regatta Bay #550F-6 by Behr. I will tell you, this particular project was the biggest bitch of our house. The HBIC, the loft, the hub of the top floor, the queen of interaction, the heart of connection. You can't get to any of the upstairs rooms without passing through her space which is kind of cool but essentially that just means painters-taping 6 doorways worth of trim and let me tell you, that sucks.

The ace, as always, is playing dress up. Starting a room out with a clean slate makes things much easier to envision and create. This particular territory had galactic gleam built right into it's walls. I could sense it. Kalynn has made me some pretty sweet lunar masterpieces over the last couple of years and they have been waiting patiently in my filing cabinet for their chance to go on stage.

Although I don't feel the need to document every sample of her budding artistic expression, I do want to get back in to my writing groove and the only thing I feel compelled to write about at the moment is where I've been spending the most time. It seems fitting to show some of the brush strokes that have spattered my proverbial canvas.

This little waxing crescent was cut from a paper plate and covered in tin foil. The stars are a yellow construction paper soaked in glitter glue and the blue ribbon was taken off an old piece of Cabbage Patch clothing. 

I was constructed my very own rocket ship this summer by my little aspiring astronaut. She says once she gets to the moon, she'll buy herself some space clothes so she fits in with the aliens. Space house slippers are on the top of her list. She says "there must be a store around there somewhere..."

Ok, so the desk.

This monumental piece of furniture where I sit and write stories, where I pay my bills, where I piece together home videos, where I edit all of your beautiful wedding clips, where I house my photography and craft ideas, the external hard drive of my brain, my desk! 

Oh, how I love the square chair shape of my ass after having been sitting for hours talking to you guys.

This tiny little corner of my house feels just like I'm a baby being swaddled in the literary cloth of modern technology. 

Yes. 

And as I sit and stare at my 4 computer screens, my framed family photos, and my adorable little mouse pad, I turn my head to the left and see one of my very favorite pieces of art of all time... a celestial bloom drawn by BJ. 

This world lost BJ on November 5th, 2010. It was a Friday. When I got the call, the sky was completely black. Kind of like it is right now. Not even a cheshire cat grin above us. I swear the illumination of the entire universe dimmed.

Of all the art I saved from him over the years, this is my absolute favorite.

Now.

However enchanting I believe my room to be in the evenings when the dimmer switch dips low, the sound of summer rain permeates the deafening air, and flickering candle light makes dancing shadows across floor, 

the ever alert sunshine comes barreling through morning after morning. 

My office stands tall, does an immediate and intense 'about-face' on its crisp black dress shoes, and selflessly makes way for Sponge-Bob Squarepants, over sized Legos and the daily My Little Pony parade. 

Thus, the circle of life is complete.

So this is where I've been lately. In case you were wondering.

I wish you all a smooth transition from Summer to Autumn. Try to remember during this time of acrobatic swaying, not to take anything too serious on one side or the other.
It's all about balance.

"I hope that the greens, purples, and oranges of your swirls stay bright and don’t ever get too sour. Such things ruin perfectly good paintings." - BJ Backman 1978-2010


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Tickled Pink

While perusing our local furniture store a few months back, I was startled to turn a corner and run right into this Victoria's Secret shopping bag display wall.

"How adorable!," I thought.
"Kalynn would love this for her room and it would be so simple!," I said to myself.
"I could knock that out in a couple hours tops!" I said to my husband.

Away my cocky self went to the home improvement store and I showed my picture to the paint man while ordering in my most matter-of-fact voice: 

"I need two cans of pink paint please. The first needs to be a shade lighter than the color of ham, closer to the most intimate cavern of a queen conch shell. The second needs to be like a dirty stripper, stiletto heels, ripped fishnet stocking, Friday night sort of pink." 

This was the very first room to paint in our very first house and I wanted to do the whole thing without my husband's help because this was a girl's room which reasoned that the girls should do the painting. 

I popped opened the can with the enthusiasm of champagne on New Years Eve. I had my rollers, I had my tray, I had my tarp, I had my hyped up daughter with her own miniature version of a brush and we were ready to disco. 

As we approached the half hour mark, I noticed I was missing my tiny doppelgänger with whom I was collaborating, so I poked my head out into the loft and found this display of pure slothfulness. Vivacity for paint was out and in its place was a new allegiance to the latest Sophia The First episode.

It was clear I was on my own.

2 days and a mere half wall of taped trim later, I was apologetically and soulfully begging my husband for help. My carpal tunnel couldn't handle my 80's Pandora station any longer than my brain could take more paint fumes. Administering perfect vertical lines on a textured wall frustrated me more than my 3rd failed Algebra class in college. 

I was in tears, I was drunk, and I was donezo.

I quit.

With Jason to the rescue, I happily tootled off to work while he finished up the closet, the trim and the insides of the window sill. 

I never even made it to the Stripper Pink, just left her hanging upside down on the pole.  

Eh, such is life. 

As a result of too much wine and too little patience, Kalynn now has a blinding monotone bedroom the color of a newborn naked mole rat.    

I think the room looks like a royal dream. Jason says it looks like a little girl exploded in here.

She's beyond thrilled with the results and she's the one who has to live in it so I suppose that's all that matters. 

I'm pleased with the way her ballet barre turned out considering it and the mirror were both scores from our local Habitat For Humanity store. She's taken up such a love of dance this year, I know it'll be something she'll continue to pursue. Every time she outgrows a pair of slippers, I'll hang them. It'll be our version of her growth chart. 

Jason moved the closet organizer, which was originally in the guest room, and we somehow managed to hang all 23,000 of her dress up princess costumes and tutus. 

Her Josef Original Through The Years figurines have a new shelf to set up occupancy and show themselves off as the collection grows one doll larger each birthday.  

Now that Kalynn had been rewarded with a room fit for all the majestic tea parties her budding heart could desire, it was time to attend to our much more furry, 4 legged daughter.

Like many houses with a set of stairs, we enjoy a small curious storage space underneath.

As it turns out, our "storage" is really the opening to a 4 foot crawl space complete with built in descending ladder.  

It creeps me out. 

I don't want storage bins where spiders could potentially be setting up a Dexter-type laboratory and waiting for me to fall asleep. I'm afraid I will go to grab a box of Halloween ornaments and a million hatched mass murderers will jump on my face and eat me alive. Are there realistically more spiders in the garage where all the storage bins ended up? Probably. Is my fear of an under-the-stair, spider-run slaughter house logical? Nuh uh. But, it is what it is. 

So we had this unused space. The trap door was covered with a piece of wood and there was a roll of surplus carpet in the garage which Jason cut and laid on the floor. I used the remainder of the pink paint to cover the patchy dry walls. 

Once we put Guacamole's bed and basket of play pigs inside, she quickly staked claim to the room and we knew it was a match. 

After a new welcome mat and valance, she had herself a puppy house. 

Her name plate has since been added so the spiders know who's territory this is.

I've taken the liberty of hanging Molsey her very own sexy fireman which she can now gaze at with her one non-blind eye. No good bachelorette pad is complete without a little smut, you know.  

Now that both of our girls had the bedrooms they've always dreamed of, it was time to start working on our own. 

But more on that next time.


(For now, find me on Instagram! TheBrighterWriter)

The Backyardigans

Ode To The Back Yard, by Krista Fuller 2014

Roses red, veggies are green

Your small army of assorted Elvis garden gnomes make you ever serene.

~The End

When Jason and I bought this house, I knew the backyard had potential to be the botanical escape which I had been longing to feel. Our buried treasure hidden under 2 feet of snow refused to reveal what kind of magic we were working with, but I knew whatever it was would be fantastic.

(And it always will be if you go in with this sort of attitude, mind you.)

After the snow surrendered, we were left with a crispy blanket of dormant grass and a tree resembling Keith Richards. 

And then one day...

From Keith Richards to Richard Simmons!

Half dead and snorting his father's cremated ashes suddenly transformed into glitter shorts and deep thigh lunges! Oh Huzzah!  Any shyness was thrown out the proverbial window as he opened his trench coat to reveal all the strength and beauty hiding under his knickers!

Albeit, a trip to the groomer never hurt anybody.

Those little sucker plants at his trunk were rooted so deep, it took 3 days of chopping, cutting and axing to get down to the nitty gritty of things. We hijacked his winter coat and all of his modesty, but we got the job done. 

("Well, hello there neighbors! Charmed, I'm sure!" *blush blush*)

Nowadays, our little tree is renting out his trunk to make a home to our personal fairy. 

It has recently become clear to Kalynn that her teeth will soon begin to sporadically fall out, and she'll be rewarded in coins as soon as this happens. 

Her logical 4-year-old brain has come to the conclusion that in order for the tooth fairy to not accidentally forget where she lives, she should probably just set up camp for the next year and wait patiently in the back yard. Just in case. 

So we've made her a place to get comfy. 

Our tooth fairy has stepping stones leading around back under the wooden arch to her own miniature picnic table where she can enjoy lemonade and tarts. 

Continuing to the other side of the tree, she can cross the bridge as to not get her teeny slippers wet in the enchanted river. 

And finally on the other side of her secret swimming hole, she has her very own raised garden bed, complete with itty bitty scare crow and planting tools. 

Moving along, on the opposite side yard we had this turd of an eyesore. The space conceivably had the undeveloped promise of a budding future if given the right creativity and appreciation, it just needed to be tapped into. 

The previous owners left us all this composite "better board" planking in a heap on the side of the house. My dad and my husband figured they would try the theory of resurrecting Sleeping Beauty with true love's kiss. 

She's alive!

A good strong power wash, a couple strands of clear bulbs, a "borrowed" glass table from my boss at the bar, a few plants and decorations, we have ourselves the perfect summer hang out spot!

I'm so in love with this space! Imagine a cold carafe of margaritas on a hot evening with Billie Holiday quietly playing in the background to the beat of the Summer crickets... 

It is quite possibly the most romantic place on earth. 

And all it cost us was a box of deck screws from the local hardware store. Even better. 

Looking out from our newly crafted deck was the other corner. 

You guys, do you remember the scene in the movie Pet Sematary where Rachel tells a story about being traumatized by her sister Zelda whom they hid away in a back room because she was super sick and creepy looking and she ended up choking on her own tongue and dying? Yes well, if the pretty little fairy garden corner of our house is Rachel, this other sister corner would be Zelda. 

There was a very sad and skinny willow tree surrounded with weeds being roped down to a metal pole presumably for strength, and a rectangular square of abandoned dirt where a swing set or play ground used to set. 

Now here is the issue: this was supposed to be my outside movie theater spot. 

This is something I've dreamed of and wished upon a star for! 

I needed this to heal and repair quickly!

 Unfortunately, some new sod would do the trick but it was going to take a little time. 

About 6 weeks ago we watered and waited, watered and waited, watered and waited. 

Eventually, after unpacking its bags and making itself at home, it was like the sod had always been there. No ugly hemming stitches, no seams, no scars. The sister had been miraculously mended, her tongue reapplied, a makeover on TLC's What Not To Wear, and she was ready to come out of the Shame Room.  

It was time to plan our first outside family movie night.

We had BBQ spare ribs, we had coleslaw, we had blankets, pillows, popcorn, micobrews... 

And then we had this:

I was as sad as a Twinkie who had lost its package mate. I felt all alone in the world. My cinema dream had run off to join the circus and I was going to have to watch re-runs of Friends to keep myself entertained. 

Ho hum...

But then! There was a loud boom of thunder and a giant gust of wind and we watched in awe as the storm passed right over our heads hurrying along like it was late for a party. With the new bright sky starting to make its way over, it was time to set up for our own!

Bring on the projector and the lawn chairs and the sleeping bags and the booze! It was time to watch Barbie: The Pearl Princess!

(Never mind our unfinished flagstone patio.)

With our treated willow tree full and happy, our green grass freshly mowed, and faith restored in miracles, it was time to start the show!

Kalynn had saved her allowance for weeks in order to purchase the matching mermaid dress that went along with the movie. Once she realized she could do her ballet routine and watch her own shadows whenever a song came on, the evening pretty much went down as the coolest night in the history of the world. 

We stayed up for a second showing of Summer School after we put Kalynn to bed and I'm pretty sure I caught some of the neighbors sneaking peeks from their upstairs windows. I mean, who wouldn't? Mark Harmon is the coolest actor ever.

All in all, this has been one of the most productive Summers our family has ever had. Between swimming lessons, summer camps, work, day trips, picnics, and renovating, it's a shock I still find time to drink as much as I do! 

(just kidding)

(?)

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TheBrighterWriter

Captain Krista's Counter Culture

Have you ever seen those clunker cars where the hood or passenger side door is a different color than the rest of the car's body? 
We had the culinary equivalent. 
We had a clunker kitchen. 

The walls were that unfortunate color of hammered down concrete which was bad enough, but in addition the counter tops were the color of Yoda. 

Not like a bright, young and energetic Yoda. More like a hungover Yoda who had woken up after just 2 1/2 hours of sleep to find he had rolled over a dirty diaper and was now snuggled up to a big girl with breath smelling of kitty litter.  

For further reference, I'll include a photograph.

On the opposite wall there was a lovely laminate counter top sprinkled with multiple shades of tan. It was a beautiful mix of armadillo, peanut shells, pine cone, Indian tee-pee and Tara Reid.  I couldn't understand why the previous owners would have replaced one and not the other. But for whatever reason, they didn't. 

When we bought the house, replacing the mismatched counter tops was on code red urgency. So much so that in one of our counteroffers to purchasing this quaint little palace, we put in writing that the sellers must disclose to us the place where these new counters were acquired so that we could get the avocado ones out of here as soon as humanly possible. 

Turns out; Home Depot. 

Easy enough. 

Now to tend to these horrific walls. 

Again.

I was wanting a creamy pastel sort of pale teal color for the paint but none of the color swatches were really what I was going for.  Our living room lamps were however that particular shade so I marched one of them into Home Depot and they were able to color match. Technology is amazing. 

I know these pictures aren't the best given that they were taken on a cell phone (latest and greatest iPhone or not, an actual camera always does more justice), but my point isn't really the colors as much as the change. Just notice the very drastic shift from the dark side of the moon to the silver lining. My entire mood was lifted like wallets in the streets of Paris with each brush stroke.

Ok, so putting a stop to the discrepancy of the counter tops was a process. 

The lady at our local Home Depot was a horrible person with a disastrous personality and to say we didn't hit it off very well would have been an enormous understatement. 

Now, I know nothing about home renovation.

I make this no secret.

I've never owned a home, I've never replaced counter tops, I don't even know when the last time I stepped foot in a home improvement store would have been. 

However, I'm not an idiot.

I was trying to get through the ordering process just as unscathed as this road-kill of a customer service representative. Turns out, some people have a rough time playing well with others so I ended up telling her to have a nice afternoon (that isn't what I told her) and I went to the other side of town and visited with Fort Collins' other Home Depot. 

This new woman was extraordinary. She explained all the steps, how everything would go down and in what order. We matched the laminate, we chose the back splash wall, we decided on the waterfall trim and that was all there was to it. A week after we had a guy from the tile and stone company come to our house to measure, it took 2 1/2 weeks for fabrication, and a week after that it was installed. 

Easy Peasy.

We skipped paying the extra cash and took our old tops and sink off ourselves. By ourselves I mean Jason and our friend Grant and absolutely nothing involving myself personally unless you count snapping pictures. 

The newbies were installed the following day in under an hour. 

This next picture is the one that absolutely kills me. I was just flipping though the pictures from a post a few weeks back called 50 Shades of Pewter Mug and standing from the same point of view the place is so dark! I just can't even believe how much brighter the whole house looks with just a few coats of lighter paint on the walls. If I have any advice for anyone looking to spruce their place up on a budget, just grab of couple of rollers and a head over to your nearest home improvement store (NOT the Home Depot on the corner of Lemay and Mulberry in Fort Collins, Colorado). It's the biggest bang for your buck for sure.  

With order restored in the kitchen area and a brightness breathing life back into our little cave, I feel much more at ease with posting some summer recipes in the near future. 

However, for now I'm going to do nothing but sit. It's been 2 months of remodeling and I need a bit of a break. I've been sick all week with a hellacious head cold and there is an Adirondack chair, a brand new Tom Robbins book, and a glass of iced tea in the back yard screaming my name. 

Have a great weekend!